Talking behind your colleagues’ backs has more benefits than drawbacks.
I’ll share my reasons right now.
Imagine that you are in a rather common situation in which a colleague of yours has done something stupid:
one of those things that you would never do, not even by accident.
Want an example?
Well, completely fail the presentation of a project that can be worth a promotion, or get your nerves blown during a discussion with the boss (going one step away from telling him what you think of him). And so on…
How do you behave with your colleague in similar situations?
There are three options:
- Shut up and mind your own business: after all, you’re not his tutor. But keeping everything inside is not good for your health, so why keep your opinions to yourself?
- Call the colleague aside and give him your feedback, trying to help him get out of a jam; the intent is praiseworthy, but not without risk. What if he doesn’t then understand that you want to help him? What happens if he takes it sideways? No, better not to take the risk: talk, yes, but not to him;
- The third option is to comment with other colleagues on the incident, analyzing the situation in detail.
What advantages does the third option bring?
Many, I would say.
Let’s see them briefly:
- it will allow you to maintain good relations with your colleague, to whom you can continue smiling without any fear;
- will strengthen your relationship with other colleagues and your team spirit, as you discover common views about the nonsense the unfortunate man did. And common views are known to strengthen relationships;
- it will help you to consolidate your self-esteem, since the accurate analysis you conducted confirms the quality of your performance. Because you never do this kind of mistake, do you?
- will allow you to give indirect feedback to the person concerned: sooner or later your comments will reach him/her without your exposure.
Convenient, isn’t it?
Of course, there’s no guarantee that you won’t suffer the same fate on the first occasion,
but you can’t have everything.
Don’t you think?